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I do all these things when I’m with my kids. I’m definitely raising them with a sense of humor. If I screw up, we all just laugh. The important thing is – they are happy, healthy, learning, growing, loved. But when it comes to dating, I’m not really willing to let go on these things. Not right now, anyway. I’m simply not willing to risk being vulnerable. There’s too much at stake. • I’m in charge of my kids’ well-being, not some woman I date. • I’m responsible for paying my bills and mortgage, not some woman I date. • I’m motivated to buy and cook healthy meals, not some woman I date. Since I’m caring for my kids and running a household solo (the half-time they are with me), I can’t afford to be weak. There’s no one to cover for me. Sure, I make mistakes. But at the end of the day, my kids know I’m there doing my best to take care of them. I’m not going to give equal status around my house, and with my kids, to a girlfriend who may not be around next week. Things would be different if I remarried – then I could be vulnerable and know that she’s got my back. Maybe that’s my problem when it comes to dating – I’m too self-assured in how I move through my days, and I’m not leaving much room for a woman to contribute. At least not where my kids are concerned.
